In honor of National Breastfeeding Week here's a little reflection on our journey....
I was determined. I was going to breastfeed solely. We told all the doctors. Glared at them with evil looks when they came close to you with pacifiers. Struggled through that first night when you were all congested with fluid squeezing milk into your mouth.
Then came the newborn phase of cluster feedings and this new normal. The feelings of inadequacy, of frustration. Of pure joy that I was able to do this for my child. There was highs and there was lows. Tears flowed when we struggled through your tongue tie and relief when we finally got it clipped. Times where I felt like I did nothing but feed you in a day. Had to give up my beloved cheese because you couldn't handle dairy.
But then the rolls appeared and you blossomed. You soared off the charts and we never looked back. I finally felt like I knew what I was doing. I could do this. I could feed you. Provide all the nutrition you needed.
Nursing became your comfort as you got more and more mobile. When you stumble and fall, you look for Mama. I love that. I love that we have that bond.
Here we are at 10 months. A milestone I was determined to hit but yet it seemed so far away. You still nurse for nutrition but mainly you nurse because you love it. I see your eyes light up when I sign it. You love the cuddles and the closeness as much as I do girl.
So we will keep going because I know it's what's best for you. I don't know when this nursing relationship of ours will stop. In some ways I pray that you just decide one day you're done. That may be better on us both. In the meantime I will continue to treasure our time together (and try to especially remember this in the middle of the night) and know it will go fast.
I'm so glad I can do this for you Baby girl. That mama's body is able to do this for you. What an amazing thing, huh?
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